Patience

Sometimes all we miss is patience. We need patience to understand that we need to make the decisions together. We need to understand that we can heal together. We can change together. All we need is to know that nothing happens overnight nor it will be easy. People are usually more successful in making changes when they have the support of a loving partner.

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🌹🌹The gift of a mother🌹🌹

🌸Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms out there. 🌸How blessed we are to have brought children into this world, a reflection of us, a glimpse into a future we try to create. It is hard work to be a mother, to care for another, to put one’s needs above your own, to offer one’s the best you can offer. There will be sleepless nights, and days filled with worries, and times when you doubt yourself and wonder if you’re doing it all right. But then you tell yourself that nobody is perfect and that you’re doing the best you can possibly do, and that it is okay to break down so that you can rise up again. I went to a christening party for a baby girl last evening. My family and my friends were there to celebrate a new soul who came into this world. It made me remember that although my son is 18 now and on his way to build the life he wants, he will always be my baby just as I will always be my parents’s baby. The passage of time shouldn’t alter the bond between parents and their children and regardless how far they might wander they know that they could always come back home. And even if the relationship with one’s mother hadn’t been a very close one, just look at your circle and see that God had sent a mother figure in your life to guide you in your moments of hardships. And if your mother is long gone from this world like my mother you still have other moms around and you can cherish their work of raising daughters and sons and being their guiding light into darkness. 🌸🌸Happy Mother’s Day!🌸🌸 Love, Carmen Monica

I slowly learned

I have slowly learned that even if I reacted, it wouldn’t change a thing, it wouldn’t make people suddenly love me and respect me, it wouldn’t magically change their mind. Sometimes it was best to let things be and let people go. It was okay not to fight for closure, not to ask for explanations or chase answers. It was okay if people didn’t understand where I was coming from. I have learned that life was better lived if I didn’t center on what happened around me and instead I centered it on what was happening inside me. So, I started working on myself and my inner peace.

Here is the truth

It is said that being pretty doesn’t keep a man nor being honest or loyal. Treating a man good worrying for him or being there for the man doesn’t keep him. Making an effort and paying attention or just spending time with him doesn’t keep a man. You can have the best intentions and the most sincere feelings, you can be a good woman and still not be able to keep a man unless that man wants to be kept by you. A woman can’t force a man to be with her or stay with her. You can tell if a man wants to stay when the relationship goes through hard times and he fights for you because a man only fights for the girl he wants to belong to. So if he doesn’t fight for you when times get hard, then that means he doesn’t want to be kept by you. So, love yourself enough and let go of him. It doesn’t mean that you give up on him. It means that he gave up on you and you shouldn’t waste any more time than you already have. Know when it’s time to let go. Know when it’s time to walk away. Know when the man doesn’t want to be kept by you.

Thoughts about trust

It takes only one word to hurt a woman, a matter of seconds, one stupid, impatient blow of the crop. But winning her trust back takes years. And sometimes there isn’t time. It is so amazing how unimpressed men are by being loved when it doesn’t fit their plans. Love irks them so much that they push the women away or they leave without warning. But when women stop loving them, men fall into a void of their own making. They don’t know how to cope with the loss. They start searching for the woman they once loved trying to find her into the next woman they date only to realize how foolish it had been to push away the only woman they had ever loved.

Some people cannot love you

Some folks cannot love you the way you want to be loved because they are emotionally and spiritually frozen. They withdraw and evade affection. You must understand that you will never meet a deep penetrating gaze from their shallow eyes; only a surface glance. They will touch your hand, but they will never invest their hearts. They will serve your body but never your soul. They can only connect with you through how useful you can be to them but never through passion.

If you need chocolate or a jar opened, they are perfect; if you need compassion or wisdom, you are all alone. Some will cry when you leave, and some will disappear you when you cry. They are the results of what society has made them, not as nature intended them to be. They pretend to live life impeccably, but they don’t know a thing about life. They are nothing else but empty shells. They are dead inside. And they will break your heart if you let them. They see themselves as friendly, but more often than not they are mean and cold. They feel superior but lack originality. When you challenge their sweet daydreaming with anything that stimulates their thoughts, they will panic and flee. And they will make you feel crazy for being different.

You cannot change these people. They become entombed inside themselves. You will waste your whole life waiting for them to wake up to the treasure of what you have to offer. You can’t snap them out of their sleep. Often, only a tragic event will possibly awaken them. Sometimes they wake up during a painful life transition. Some wake up on their deathbeds. Some sadly never realize their potential for self-knowledge, intimacy, expression of love and feelings, and knowing love.

Maybe you know someone like this. Or, maybe it is you. Perhaps you are the one who is dead inside, and this will prompt you to take action before it becomes too late.

Love,

Carmen-Monica

 

The art of remaining silent

The motto that marked and changed my life is that if you cannot say anything good, say nothing at all. We are not created the same way. We have a different design, although our creation follows the same principles. Some of us are genetically more sensitive than others. The outside factors don’t act upon us in the same ways. Whatever some might view as normal, others might view as unusual. The first rule of common sense says not to judge whatever you can’t understand or doesn’t fall in the category of things you view or consider normal. Don’t be in a hurry to express your opinions. Stop in place, think, put yourself in the other’s place and give it a chance. We might do the same things during the day, but our unique design allows the outside factors to influence us in ways that make us unique. It is the reason why we act differently to the influences acting upon us.